Ever notice how the voice in your head runs the show?
It’s like having a 24/7 commentator living rent-free upstairs, whispering (or shouting) things like:
- "You’ll never make it."
- "You’re not smart enough."
- "Why even try?"
This voice shapes what you believe about yourself, your abilities, and your future.
And here’s the crazy part—it’s often lying to you.
Where does it come from?
Old stories. Stories you’ve been telling yourself for years.
Stories you picked up from other people—parents, teachers, society—without realizing it.
The result?
You walk through life carrying narratives that either empower you or trap you in a cycle of self-doubt and fear.
Why Your Stories Matter
Your mind doesn’t deal directly with reality.
It deals with stories—stories it constructs from the raw data streaming in through your senses.
And here’s where things get tricky:
If the story you’re telling yourself is negative or limiting, your mind will filter out any evidence to the contrary. It’ll double down on that limiting belief and keep you stuck.
Consider this example:
A child who grows up hearing, “You’re always screwing things up” might develop a limiting belief that they are inherently incapable.
As an adult, this narrative could manifest as self-doubt, fear of failure, or reluctance to take risks.
On the flip side, imagine a child who hears, “I believe in you; you can achieve great things.”
This supportive narrative can foster confidence, resilience, and a growth mindset. The story we tell ourselves becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Becoming Aware of Your Stories
The first step in editing your inner stories is awareness.
Ask yourself:
- Is this story aligned with reality, or am I making assumptions?
- Does this story reflect my values and the person I want to become?
- Is this narrative helping me feel hopeful and optimistic, or is it dragging me down?
By questioning the validity and usefulness of your inner stories, you begin to see which ones serve you and which ones need rewriting.
How to Rewrite Your Inner Stories
Rewriting your inner stories isn’t about lying to yourself or ignoring reality—it’s about creating a narrative that empowers you to grow and thrive.
Here’s how to start:
1. Identify the Limiting Story:
Take a moment to reflect on a situation where you feel stuck. What is the story you’re telling yourself about this situation?
2. Challenge the Story:
Ask yourself if this story is objectively true. Is there evidence to support it, or is it based on fear and past experiences?
3. Craft a New Narrative:
Replace the limiting story with an empowering one.
For example, if your current story is, “I’m terrible at public speaking,” rewrite it as, “I’m learning to become a better public speaker, and every opportunity helps me grow.”
4. Reinforce the New Story:
Writing by hand, recording your voice, and repeatedly reviewing the new narrative can help solidify it.
According to research, the act of physically writing down your story creates stronger neural pathways, making it easier for the new story to take root.
Takeaway: You Are the Editor of Your Life
Life doesn’t hand you a finished script.
You get to write it.
You get to choose whether you’re the hero who overcomes or the victim who stays stuck.
And while you can’t control everything that happens to you, you can always control the story you tell yourself about it.
So, what’s your next chapter going to say?
This post was inspired by Shane Parrish interview with Dr. Jim Loehr.
