By Allison Cohen – M.A., MFT, Marta Hatter – LCSW

How To Improve Your Self-Worth

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

You are worthy of love and belonging Brené Brown Quote
Allison Cohen

Self worth is a tricky thing.

Because our lives, thoughts and experiences are ever evolving, our esteem can rise to its zenith and plummet to its depths, if we don’t have a handle on the true source.

Often, we struggle to appreciate ourselves because we pin our value on others perceptions. 

If we interpret that information in the negative, we assume it must be true and accordingly punish ourselves for ‘not being good enough.’

The only way to truly grow and sustain your personal worth is to glean it from your core.

It is vital to look deep inside yourself to take an honest appraisal of your virtues and weaknesses. 

When your insecurities, other persons or life circumstances start to make you question yourself, look to that internal list to praise yourself when you deserve/need it and work on what can be improved upon when necessary.

When you create an internal focus, you quiet the noise from the outside world, your attention to others perceptions melt away and you create a pool of emotional resources to dive into when you need to self soothe.
Essentially, you build an invisible (but potent) force field that will allow you to weather the storm of fears and doubts that when left unchallenged, wreak havoc on your esteem.
Allison Cohen, M.A., MFT –
Marta Hatter

Many people struggle with self-image, identifying a purpose, or a sense of significance.

Instead of focusing on this issue, take your eyes off of yourself. 

You have a purpose. What do you have strong feelings about? Advocate for? Want to change? Believe in? You have Infinite Value, no matter what anyone has ever said to the contrary.

Consider your finger and toe prints, your DNA; unequaled, unduplicated, unique. You have a purpose. 

Redirect your attention from your self-worth, to actions you can take that express your values. 

You will find yourself shoulder-to shoulder with other people who take action. You do make a difference.

  • If you have a heart for cancer patients, begin participating in cancer walks and sharing with others. 
  • If social injustice upsets you, donate to amazing organizations or contact them to see how you might volunteer your time.
  • Care about the homeless? Help to feed them or participate with a group who builds homes for them. 
  • Have you lost the elders in your family? Visit and read to those in nursing homes in your area. 
  • Do you love children, and long to be a parent? Participate at your local library for Story-time, or volunteer in the nursery at your church.

You have a responsibility to give, contribute, share, assist, and care.

When you focus on these areas as best you are able, you WILL impact others and then you will experience fulfillment and the worth within you while meeting quality people who take action and make a difference. 

You have infinite value, worth that cannot be measured.

Marta Hatter, LCSW –

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